Good Luck, Sarah. If your baby won’t sit in his highchair, DON’T: let him eat whilst crawling or toddling around. -Run, swim, play! He absolutely hates being strapped in anywhere – car seat, pram, high chair. Can you remove the tray and move the chair up to the table or buy a booster seat and let your toddler sit at the table. She continued to scream for the next 10 minutes or so until I just couldn’t take it anymore (my throat was starting to hurt from listening to her). Our table is right next to theirs so we still enjoy meals together. A 16-month old friend of ours refused to eat any way other than standing. The key to him eating super well is for him to be otherwise engaged and active. Your child will only become increasingly more obnoxious with ridiculous battles for the next few years. No. She's incredibly well behaved in every other aspect, she's definitely getting enough healthy food to eat throughout the day and speaks and understands clearly when we talk to her--she just doesn't follow our request/insistence/firmness/nicely asking/etc to sit down to eat for a few minutes. One thing was he was entering a clingy phase, which just happens throughout their young life. Try to hang on to what is most important to you about mealtime in the meantime. Strapping her in might cause some carry-over from her hatred of being “trapped” in the high chair, and as long as she’s seated close to you or your husband, she’ll be perfectly safe sitting on a regular chair. She was fine once she sat at the table in the booster seat, and within a few days she would let us put the tray on the booster seat. Many kids this age won't sit still. Looking back, I believe she wanted to sit at the table, rather than off to the side in the high chair. If this doesn't work, talk to the pediatrician. However my son, who is 18 mths now, does NOT do well in a booster seat. There are lots of developmental benefits. We try to get him to eat lunch in it but usually he eats it ''on the run'' while playing outside, in the park, or sometimes even in the living room. But as you learned, sometimes that trick isn’t enough. at best. During the day, the 18 mo is in share care. -When you serve meals, put the healthiest items on the plate first. We took off his high chair tray and let him join us at the table at his own setting, and I vowed to avoid letting him eat alone. My daughter did this. He loves his new booster seat so much! But the concession needs to be an alternative other than your lap. Her weight has always been below the bottom of the chart (literally less than 1 percentile!) Our son - now 3.5 - still plays while eating and while we feed him. It may engage him long enough for you to finish your errand. I’m all about choosing my battles, but getting her to continue forward with building independence seems pretty important, so I hate to keep giving in to her demands to sit in my lap during meal times. Then I bought her a Dora mat. He screams at the top of his lungs when I tell him no. To the mother of the toddler who won't sit in her highchair: We had the same problem with our son at about the same age. My son would not sit at the table and would attempt to make his way out of the kitchen altogether. Spoon feeding mama, Our daughter, who is almost 3 years old, was like your son. Finally, do you think your son gets enough sleep? He especially enjoys when his older brother is with us for meals (I share time with his dad) as there is additional interaction, conversation, fun at the table. He also does better in his high chair and sitting down with our son for meals. It's difficult to retire all these gadgets, but maybe you could trade your high chair in for a small table and chairs? At 18 months many are so much more into being mobile and exploring that food time is just too boring. She did not like being strapped into the booster or anything else. Hi, my 17 month old hates his high chair and won’t get in. We had one that included a strap and a tray, but you might want to consider a simpler, strap-free model like this one, or even this. Let him express some agency. I think 15 months is too young to punish this behavior, especially by denying food. The other It turned out none were, in this particula r group. We have affiliate revenue relationships with Amazon, and with other retailers that are handled by third parties like Skimlinks, RewardStyle, Commission Junction and Linkshare. In my experience, the best way to get kids to sit down to eat, is to sit down and eat with them and only feed them when they are seated in their chair; either in the high chair, which is what we use for our 18 month old, or at the table. I say drop the power struggle. It’s heavy enough that they can’t really push away from the table, but it’s more of a “real chair” look and gets them up to the right height. I think you are on the right track and it is time ask your husband to get off the floor and sit at the table East Bay Mom, I remember those days well. The one place she sits still briefly, is on a little chair we have on the deck where we have a small end table that's just her size. We could also put her high chair at the table, but she never liked that (I think the chair became too much of an issue, so now she doesn't want to use it). NOT a big deal! If we let him feed himself, he wouldn't eat enough. Amy is mother to rising first-grader Noah, preschooler Ezra, and toddler Ike. It can be converted from a high chair to a toddler’s chair, but can also be used as a regular chair for any age. A booster seat worked for us but dd will still sit happily in a high chair when out. Sleeps through and his parents are delighted. OK, I am officially shocked. Perhaps if your son is still in a high chair it would be better to move him to a booster so he is more part of the table. I wish I could tell you that he sits politely and eats with us at every meal but instead we've all made some compromises and as he matures he wants to emulate our behavior more than fight us-- and he's at a healthy weight so it could be worse. My 3 year old boy was the same way at 2.. and 1 and is finally starting to outgrow it as he's slowing down and his attention span is getting longer. My mom keeps her while we work and she has been putting up a little more fight than usual there, too (although it is characteristic for her to behave much better for my mom than for me… we like to push the limits around here!). They were stoked to have a real chair fit just for… Read more ». This phase drove my husband a little nuts because he came from a big family that ate at 6 pm sharp every day. We thought it was another phase and so we began to feed him while we read, played and occassionally while he was in the tub. Plus it doesn't set a good precedent for eating generally. Both of my kids have gone through this phase. My daughter is now 4.5 years, but I could have written your post several years ago, so I can share a bit of our story and what has worked for us over the years. Your husband is not ''training'' your son to be a manipulative little brat who is going to expect to be fed whenever and wherever he wants. “Short phase?” Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!! Expensive but very worth it, as it looks like furniture and grows with a kid. I told him he had two choices: sit at the table and eat with us or sit in the bedroom by himself. We make sure they get nice and hungry, by limiting snacks. 2 Read aloud to your child. Our kids eat from a small table. This toddler chair is durable, light weight, and has And don't worry, they do settle down. It turned out he simply felt he was a big boy now and wanted to eat at the table with us, on real chairs as we did. Since you are asking for advice, I am going to be straightforward here and say you really need to relax and adjust your expectations. so it's not a pain. Space saver: Baby Jogger City Bistro High Chair. I serve a midday meal (which I call a snack) on a cool plate on his play table and he helps himself as he plays throughout the day. She still says its her favorite food. So two things you DEFINITELY do not want at the dinner table: a toddler screaming her head off in a high chair, or a toddler eating her meals on your lap. This is so very important, because you’re setting your child’s appetite up to be cyclical and not random. My 2.5 year old will not sit still for dinner--if it's in her highchair she climbs up and sits on the edge, and then stands up so we have to get her down or fear she'll fall; if it's the dining room table, she stands up on the chair, or gets down, if it's in one of our laps, that lasts for a bite. You can follow Amy’s daily mothering adventures at Ama... Amalah is a pseudonym of Amy Corbett Storch. __________________________________________________________________ Re: Toddler won't eat or sit in highchair by DandelionFrosting » 10 Nov 2013, 23:59 It might not be applicable, but Saurus is about the same age, and I've found that he will happily sit in his high chair, but only if I let him climb up into it by himself. This is not only a choking hazard, it’s also counter-productive, as the more you allow him to do it, the less likely it is that he’ll ever consent to being placed in a highchair at mealtimes! I made it healthy finger foods, sometimes put in an ice-cube tray if my child was at a stage where she wouldn't just pick it up and throw it. My 16 month can now climb in and out of his chair by himself which he loves. Or a Con Law book if your spouse teaches Con Law and has a dozen different editions of these enormous books. Lots of young toddlers reject the high chair at some point — it cramps their newfound independence, makes them feel different/distant from parents or siblings, or they’ve correctly identified it as a “baby” thing and I NOT A BABY. The kids now eat at the table, more or less nicely, until they ask to be excused, at which point they are done. They can sit in a chair without the worry of falling a few feet to the ground. Our daughter also did this around 15 months. One book that really helped me (and I was very emotional about this issue at the time) was ''Child of Mine'' by Ellen Satter. Maybe she is simply out-growing her need for a high chair. On many an occasion i would look longingly at those babies, much younger than her, who could apparently sit in their highchairs for half an hour to 45 minutes as their families enjoyed a leisurely meal at a restaurant. If you think that may be the case, a suggestion would be reading Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. My youngest has almost completely outgrown the grazing phase. I just kept reminding him it was an age thing and it got much better eventually. One thing was he was entering a clingy phase, which just happens throughout their young life. Toddlers at that age are just too excited about exploring life to sit and eat, like, at all! best wishes eat, eat, eat. Using up lots of energy, running, swimming, and exploring before meal time is the best thing I can do to get children to eat and not try to wander away from the table. These are by no means quiet, intimate dinners. I thought it would be a problem to keep them in bed(or sitting at the table in this case). If your baby is able to sit up by themselves and starting to eat solid foods, it’s probably time to consider adding a high chair to your kitchen set-up. If your child won’t sit in a booster, but you’re not comfortable with them sitting at the tall kitchen chairs, then a child-size set of table and chairs may be a great alternative. If there is a question you would like answered on the Advice Smackdown, please submit it to amyadvice[at]gmail[dot]com. Instead, gently enforce the idea of eating being equated with sitting on a high chair in his small head. -As an added bonus, these are the same things I do with my ''picky'' eaters and it seems to help tremendously. It is also designed with an extra wide seat and backrest for your kid to sit and lean on. It’s your choice and that’s ok. I also second the posters who have suggested getting your child involved in meal prep. She just doesn’t want to be confined while she eats. Amy also documented her second pregnancy (with Ezra) in our wildly popular Weekly Pregnancy Calendar, Zero to Forty. She was happy as a lark! Thanks! We did work on eating meals together, and she still will not eat if she is the only one eating. We just transitioned our 4 year old out of it so we can hide a bit so it won’t be “hers” when the baby is ready for it. If he only eats a few bites he will be fine. Instead, try to make it mandatory for him to sit on the high chair while eating. Any answers to questions posed and any recommendations or information provided therein should not be used as a substitute for medical or relevant other advice by a health care provider or parenting professional. Good luck!! On that front they suggested we choose one high calorie food and add it to everything (ie butter, mayonaise, a nut butter) we chose mayonaise- a perfect dipping sauce for any vegetable! Our 27 month old son has always been an active, busy, energetic boy. As they get older, they ask to be excused and bus their plates to the sink. Soft Portable Booster Seats and Toddler Trays Are you tired of frustrating meal anon. Now we don’t care. My daughter is now almost 4, but between 1 and 2.5 we had significant trouble with meals, so I feel like I can at least help calm your worries. She isn't like some of the kids I see in restaurants who seem to stay tied into their seats for ages. He hasn't tried to control us since. My son is now 5 years old and we have a pretty calm dinnertime but at 18 months it was all about how much food I could get in his piehole before he took off or basically got too nutty in his booster seat. I think withholding food from a toddler would not work as a punishment. While she was strapped in, we attempted to go about supper as usual, but she didn’t seem to take the hint. They learn how to make conversation, they learn table manners and they learn to take time to eat and possibly avoid the habit of constant snacking. If there is a question you would like answered on the Advice Smackdown, please submit it to [email protected]. When she's a bit older, I think it will be more fun to have family meals all together - but (I think) that should be enjoyable for all, not something I am authoritatively requiring of my daughter. When we stick to this guideline, our three year old eats really well. We adopted this idea from daycare, where state law prohibits kids from walking around with food due to the chocking risks. This is not only frustrating, I am afraid she's going to choke. Rest assured, however, that those babies are a bit unusual. For dinners, my toddlers would always be willing to sit for a minute or two, but we then just accepted the toddler coming in for a bite then running off after he'd been excused. I don't believe in it. With the second we let it happen occasionally. My younger kid only wanted to sit on a regular chair at the table like his big brother. Ooo, just found this: http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/parenting/feeding-infants- toddlers/feeding-glance-birth-24-months Dr. Sears says for kids 18 to 24 months: ''Wants to eat on the runæº¶eeds creative feeding to hold attention at table. been there. The stress level has gone way down. An unbending, absolute No getting up with food rule must accompany this approach. Yeah, we definitely went through a phase of HATING the high chair and we didn’t have a booster. We have recently started putting a toddler fork and/or spoon on her high chair tray with her food to give her the option of using a utensil, but so far have not made a big deal out of using them. So if your stubborn toddler won’t quiet down in his seat, hand him a magazine from the book or magazine aisle or from a rack near the cashier. When this is the case, they start to wiggle and slide off their chair. Sit next to your child and continue to challenge him to sit still. Our daughter did this at 16-17 months old. Having a footrest at the right height is good for the body and goes a long way toward cutting down wiggles. Any tips on what we can do to resolve/avoid some of this chaos and get back to our normal, not-screamy suppers? When he gets up and says he isn't hungry, believe him. Please help! Even a high-tech high chair can’t prevent the mess, but it can make clean up less excruciating, thanks to dishwasher- and machine washable-friendly parts and a little magnetic magic. We needed the high chair for my son, so we really didn't have much choice. Hi, you don't say whether you let your son play at the dinner table. We had one of those Safety First portable high chairs that straps onto a regular chair as a booster seat and also has a tray like a high chair. All of a sudden my soon-to-be 15-month-old daughter refuses to eat in her high chair. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Just be clear and cheerful about it, it will work! still workng on table manners. Maybe this strategy will work for you. Your (and our) child WILL become a civilized eater someday but he's a toddler, there's too much fun to have, things to do and see and he doesn't want to miss a second of it. Chances are your child isn’t sitting at an appropriate eating height at your table. Don’t make it a habit to feed your child anywhere else, in case he hates his high chair. We could get my son to sit still at this age for a few minutes (maybe!) But, although they can't really be forced to sit still and eat, I would think following him around trying to convince him to eat could lead to some issues, too. Anything to get her able to eat comfortably off the table while in a chair that does not contain YOUR lap/butt.”. That happened at my house at just about your kid's age. My hope is that even if they don't eat very well, they'll still start with the most nutrient dense items. When your child refuses to sit in his high chair when you feed him alone but has no problem eating with the rest of the family, he probably feels lonely in the high chair. To guide you in your search, here are some of the best high chairs on the market today: These expert ideas for fostering good mealtime habits will help. But he’s developed an annoying little habit of refusing to sit in his high chair to eat. She has been cutting a tooth, but they haven’t really affected her like this in the past. Yes, she’ll have the freedom to get up and leave the table. She finds some obvious delight and joy in moving and exploring and I don't have the hear to squelch it. She sat better in the Keekaroo vs her new oxo booster due to the foot rest, now she’s very wiggley. Your child is too young to remember the lesson from day to day, and too young to conceptualize that you are denying the dinner because she won't sit in the highchair. I have looked through the Smackdown questions but I can’t find one related to this phase we seem to be in the middle of with our 17-month old daughter (only child). My 2.5 year old is picky, especially when he's not really hungry. We're frustrated and realize we're out of ideas. He eventually snapped out of it around 19 months, BUT…BUT we never relented by letting him wander around or sit in the grownup chair on his own. Lots of young toddlers reject the high chair at some point — it cramps their newfound independence, makes them feel different/distant from parents or siblings, or they’ve correctly identified it as a “baby” thing and I NOT A BABY. Toddlers go through stages with high chairs and everything else you want them to do. Most times we would put some food on a small table and let him come by and snack as he played. I sit my 2 year old down at the table with us in a chair like ours so she feels like a big girl. My little one will sit in his highchair, eating at home or out for about 30 minutes. Getting a squirmy toddler to sit at the table and eat a meal can be a huge challenge. However, we gave in on the lap when he wanted it, and he just grew out of it eventually. or a thick sturdy cushion. Her basic rule is parents are in charge of what, when and where the kid eats (making sure at least one item on the table is something the child likes), and the kid is in charge of whether and how much to eat. Your child's behavior is appropriate for his age. We got our keekaroo used on craigslist. Above all else: Make mealtimes pleasant! The same thing happened with my son. I had 3 and 4 year old boys over and they were so excited to sit in his chair which I adjusted for them. When I let him out (he was very upset the whole time and it was torturous!) Sur La Table has a great selection of individual metal cutters for $1 so you can find something he's really into (trains, dinosaurs, you name it). Snappy seat (snaps onto the table)? -Best wishes! Our solution was to get rid of the high chair. […] Read the full article here: When Your Toddler Say No More High Chair! My philosophy is that I am responsible for providing decent food for my child to grow, and I can work with her on how/when she gets the food into her body. I am considering getting a small table and chair for inside, but don't want to spend the money if there's some way I can teach her to stay at the big table. Sign up for the web’s most entertaining (while informative) weekly newsletter on your pregnancy! I think your daughter may simply be ready for the next step. I was just coming here to recommend the same thing. Lastly some kids are not so hungry in the evening, so maybe he really is full...Good luck, I know how stressful the journey can be, but the book I mentioned really helped me manage my anxiety around mealtimes. I am happy to say that now she happily sits in her seat and eats (still lightly, and occasionally fed by me) but she does eat. The conversion is easy to do and only takes about 20 seconds, and the best part is you don’t need any tools to do it. Our highchair has gone into temporary storage in the basement. The OG’s of kids toys created this comfy armchair as an option for kiddos ages three and up that won’t fall apart or clash with your decor. 2) If she’s resistant to sit in/on anything other than a “regular” grown-up chair, you can try a Kaboost under-chair booster. Also, by letting him decide he has had enough, you are letting him learn to listen to his own body and regulate his appetite himself, instead of doing it for him. I am of the, ''When you're done, you're done'' mentality, whereas my husband will sit on the floor with him and feed him, or pick him up and feed him from his lap when this happens. The phase isn't ending because he has learned that mom and dad will follow him around feeding him and he doesn't have to sit down to eat. So she ate everything with mayonaise (which is still one of her favorite foods). Amalah is a pseudonym of Amy Corbett Storch. For us this is one of those small stages that shall pass, eventually. And once they leave the table, the meal's over. Has erratic feeding habits'' Andi, I do not think your experience is shocking, I think it is pretty common. His friend is about a month older and his parents have had some difficulties getting him to eat meals consistently. © 2016 Alpha Mom. In fact, it’s rare that kids under 10 (or even older) sit and eat meals at an appropriate height (most kids aged 3 to 9 years need a booster seat and a stool under their feet). We were both working when the first… Read more », […] Read the full article here: When Your Toddler Says No More High Chair […], Wanted to also chime in that we also have the cheapo IKEA chair. 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